a pieced and quilted life

welcome winter

photo taken from the hunnington post, click here for a link to more pics.

could there be anything more humbling? beautiful?

the universese is always reminding us how wonderful it is to be alive. where else but earth could you watch God put on a picture show?

i feel so "grand" to be alive, grand meaning lucky...but more than just lucky. a combination of lucky, grateful, happy, priviledged, humbled, and a bit melancholy (for those wonderful souls who have passed on) to be living. this life, my life.

so winter is here. this year he came bearing a gift for those of us in southeren california.

water.

a lot of water.

it has rained 5 days straight, and is suspected to rain for another 2 days before we get a break in the clouds.

there has been polite rain that just falls in light gosamer sheets. angry rain that flew with icy winds in a eastern direction. quiet rain that barely whispers when it falls and just leaves the dirt and concrete barely darkened. flooding rain, that has collected and crowded around my brocoli, brussel sprouts, and overwintering tomatoes. soaking rains that have soaked toys coming by way of fed-ex in the minute it took me to run from my bedroom, down the stairs, and out the garage door to sneak them in from little eyes.

and finally there has been loving rain that woke me up at 5:30 a.m., cuddling next to e for warmth, and led to early morning conversation before (his) work day.

yes my friends it has been that much rain.

hopefully, christmas will be clear, cold, and sunny.

wishing you all a wonderful winter, a hapiness to living, a season full of reflecting and fortifying for the new year, and a collection of family and friends that surround you with love.

(i'm wishing for these things for myself too.)

peace...ki.

*note: due to the excessive rain and clouds i missed the eclipse, but found many great videos and pictures around the 'nets. google winter solstice lunar eclipse for pics...no need for 2011, the last one happened more than 400 years ago!

pictures for you mama, and some other random (knitting and best friend) stuff for everybody else.

 

they could barely open their eyes with the sun in their face... 

if i post a lot of pictures of my chil'ren here its because my mama demands them, regularly. she calls me up in the mid of morning and blurts out:

"send me some pictures of the kids"

it is so much easier for me to just direct her here...even though sometimes, most times, probably just to make me work a little bit harder she asks me to email them to her, and also text her some too.

if i don't have any new (and i mean within the last 48 hours new) from when her demands begin she says something like:

"geez...we don't have any new pictures...come on...i need to see some pictures of my babies...noo, some current ones"

i want to tell her that they haven't changed too much from the last set. that they are past that baby stage where they change every couple of weeks and each new month there is a list of facial features and such that has changed.

we know what they look like now. probably for almost forever. i still look about the same as i did about 26/25 years ago. well maybe i have more big people teeth, and my face is not as chubby, but still the thick eyebrows, the resemblance of my daddy...its all still there.

but still...here are almost new pictures for you mama:

 

the kids in downtown riverside

*little ones are taller than they appear in photos...especially the boy*

and i'm sorry to say that last night while brushing her teeth, yali dropped her sixth tooth. and no, i haven't taken a picture yet. so i guess she doesn't look the same...

other random stuff?

i finished some short knitting projects!

 

 

 

  

i finished my arm warmers...that are waaaay warm. and i finished my neck cowl...that is waaaaay too big...booo.

i blocked both projects to feel all knitting official...and now i'm anxious to start something new. some body please give me some suggestions...i need cheap, cute and fairly fast.

and also...i met my best friend's son for the first time...teo.

 

  

eddie roscoe, stephanie and baby teo

i can see he has so much of eddie's (my best friend, not my husband) personality...he's free, inquisitive and has the most friendly and giving spirit. within seconds of meeting me, he picked up leaves and were handing them to me. he looks like mama though...and he's a cutie.

eddie was my bestest of best friends at la verne...we have stories for days! almost all of my best memories involve in some way or another eddie roscoe. i really can go on and on with good things about him, but he'll probably read this...so i won't. hehe. let's just say he is my dearest friend. a farmer. a deeply thoughtful and spiritual guy. funny as heck...was great at keeping my gas tank full when i was broke and putting $2 in the car was fine with me, and he let me use his shoulder to cry real snot and tears on many of occasions back in the late '90's.

and...this is the kicker...he missed the taj mahal to kick it with me. yeap thats a darn good friend people. and, this is the other kicker...he gave all his clothes away to the locals there. all! i picked him up at the airport, and all he had was his backpack on his back and his harmonica in his hand. i dropped him off on his way there...so i knew he had more...when i headed for baggage...he informed me that he had given all this belongings to the locals he'd gotten to know.

he explained to me all he needed was the clothes on his back...and he'd surely acquire more soon enough. he also explained to me that clothes would be much harder for them to get than him...and finished by saying it was the least he could do after all they had given him.

i'm telling you people...he's a great guy.

...and isn't it ironic his name is eduardo...edward? him and his wife stephanie are great people, and geez i'm happy to call them my close friends.

okay...enough jiber-jabber....time for schooling today.

have a good one!

peace and luv,

ki

what i/you/we want to do right now....

my list:

1. weave scarfs and things

2. fly to the east coast to be with my sis and smoother lady bug in kisses

3. make squash bread

4. write and write and write

5. figure out if i want to re-join the fb/twitter/social networking world

6. compose with words

7. eat spaghetti with daiya that i finally got, that nina's been talking about forever!

8. sew stuffies/toys for the kids

9. see my niece and nephew in l.a.

10. spend the day talking to my papa about my ga'ma, gardening, spirituality and life

11. sign the kids up for another month of golf before school starts in sept.

12. make a woven leather bag

13. eat sweet potato fries with black-i peas and cornbread

14. play blokus with e

15. doodle about what i don't know

16. finish reading the 9 new to me books on my shelves 

17. watch season 5 of the wire with e while weaving something

18. read, and re-read, and re-read the latest piece of writing i've done, cause i love it so, but i know it needs to marinate before i can see it with fresh editorial eyes.

19. eat ciao bella blood orange/raspberry/mango sorbet

20. eat squash bread

21. unpack the boxes of new school year materials that came last week (or was it the ending of the week before then)

22. thank e for being such a wonderful husband 

23. bake squash bread with the kids (this time i said with the kids)

24. remember what i know i'm forgetting on this list...hmmmmm...

25. call and find out about my acupuncture referral...my body's acting up

what's on your list? do we have anything in common?

peace, ki

when summer comes...

i wonder if the sun is most happy in summer? i guess it depends. if he's an introvert maybe he prefers winters in portland...but if he's an extrovert than he finds himself being most authentic here in inland california during july, august and perhaps september.

without the curtains of clouds, here he has a stage to warm and many scenes to brighten...

i'm not sure i know...but i suspect he loves warming and brightening our days.

summer always creeps up on me, whether i'm anxiously waiting or reveling in the new life of spring.

this year is...no different. i waited while holding my breath on the one hand and watering my garden on the other...watching the birds, sky and clouds fall behind the backdrop of blue in the sky.

i couldn't wait to blog on summer solstice...but i had to...riverside county courts systems knows i'm a homeschooling mama...and like my kids he memorizes the last day of school...hones in on my last official dutiful teacher mama day...and marches me down to the court house to sit and await a trial...or not -- the following monday.

so this year...summer crept up on me again.

i forgot, unforgot and then forgot and remembered again.

thankfully...i have some reminders.

 

that little guy, my nephew, was born the day after summer solstice...

he's now double-digits and i just can't get over how much he's grown up. i was the first to hold him...and gosh, i can't forget how much we gushed over his dimples his first few months and years..

 

my niece...jr. high graduate and my brother...

she's my other summer baby, in fact my first...everything about her reminds me of the freshness of summer...i stayed with my brother and his (ex)wife on an air-force base...waiting for her to come...my father brother suffocated me with his parenting...though i was 19 (and he 22)...and i came back home to my mama...only to have her arrive days later...sigh. i waited for her like i was carrying her...i was the most proud auntie...and might i add...the best.

i'm so proud of them and my brother...can't help but show their faces here...though i know i'll get yelled at by him when he finds out...

celebrating their birthdays always reminds me that a) summer's here and b) how sweet it is.

 

 

the weekly trips to the farmer's market...

and the weekly...and sometimes daily harvest from our own garden.

there's no way you could smell and taste sun warmed berries and not feel like your standing knock-knee deep in the heat of summer.

i brought home a pint of blueberries, a pint of raspberries and 2 pints of blackberries.

blueberries for muffins, raspberries for snacking and smoothies and blackberries for my first attempt at berry pie (thanks sis for the years of talking up oregon's fine blackberry pie tradition!)...i'm putting my fear of seeds away (for now).

 

got tennis?

...the first of many trips to the tennis courts (and the putting greens). e gave us our first tennis lessons last summer...along with the little guy taking his first golf clinic class and well...they love the two sports.

this summer we'll concentrate on those two sports...i have more pictures and thoughts to share, but i'll save it for another post.

 

the gallery

and finally...the gallery...division nine...i love downtown riverside in the summer...i love this building...i love walking from the shop to the gallery and back again talking art stuff to cos. i've been a social bum lately...taking time to myself and not going out or doing much, but hopefully i'll get a few good downtown riverside summer days and nights in.

sometimes we have to hold ourselves back a little, hold a little of us in so that we can grow better and find our own voices and trails. that's what i'm it calling right now...but that's another post.

there are so many other signs of summer...i really could just go on and on...but really i think we (u & i) would much rather spend the day soaking in summer...instead of just talking about it.

i will say this...one of the best signs of summer?

sitting in my bed, reading or writing early in the morning or mid-afternoon...windows open and suddenly amongst the heavy heat a light breeze comes through...sweeping over my garden with it i smell the earth...the zucchini, the tomato leaves, the cilantro...the lightest wind...in the heavy heat..can carry the freshest scents...

that is the best.

enjoy summer!

peace & luv...ki

sometimes i miss the train...

 

sometimes i miss the train

cause i tend to daydream 

and wrap myself up in clouds and yellow skies.

its true. i'm always late coming to the party...and slow to catch on to witty jokes. i'm not slow...just daydreaming.

singing a tune to myself...smiling about a previous conversation...thinking about baking bread...imagining colors to mix...wishing i was making something...

so i'm late in discovering a few new things. new to me.

particularly these this week:

jersey

knitting garments

ingrid michaelson

sara bareilles

short poems

i think it takes a small catalyst sometimes...to get us out and discovering.

i discovered adele late, about january, 2009...and well she was my catalyst for ingrid and sara. short poems? thoughts that stop instead of rambling...i used to not record those, i prefer to ramble... jersey...well...i've just been afraid of it for all these years...knitting garments...again, fear. sometimes fear itself is a catalyst.

i'm still waiting to discover or "re" discover some things...like keeping my fingernails painted like my granma used to...and the time in a day to nap...again, like granma did.

something about looking down at pretty painted fingernails...even if just occasionally.

and naps...well i ♥ naps.

 

i've been just really knocked out the past 4 days with this cold. i think i'm being tortured. its like itching profusely..its just torture.

bed. 4 days? really?

that's why i'm germaphobic. honestly. i have no time or patience for sick.

but while laying incompasatated for the better part of a week...i thought..and just blew thought after thought out into the sky...and coughed up more and more and more...and just let ideas settle around me like:

ideas for new bags...hand stitching clothes...making art out of jersey...making crostini...imagining myself as a singer....making time daily for naps....appliqueing as many things around me as possible...hearts...scheduling my time...

i know this is just a ramble of a post...but remember...i said i just blew thought after thought out...and well...i like to ramble.

i have managed to find something to do while laying in bed...hand stitching. its somewhat done...but i want to wait till its done and i'm well(er) for some better pics...shouldn't be too much longer...at the rate i'm layin in bed these days...soon enough.

lastly,

i'm also late on the train of loving blue. sapphire blue...yum.

*imagining myself baking bread now...*

 ♥ ki

 

twenty-ten :: 2010

twenty-ten!!

i love new years...i love the reflection and the new beginnings of things starting anew...starting fresh!

something about closing one chapter...and turning the page and beginning another just plain excites me.

i feel refreshed...energized and ready to start another year...another chapter...

somehow as last year started coming to a close...i found myself removing myself from behind the lens of the camera...from in front of the keyboard and monitor...and just soaking up my family...and life...

i never realized how busy i was...until i was sitting down with the kids...eating breakfast and watching the price is right...just sitting there with them...yelling out prices to the screen...getting excited and bummed...and seeing who could guess the most accurate prices...i know...they're only 5 and 6...i have an unfair advantage...but they surprisingly are not half-bad.

so yes...there is the truth...i was the most non-productive...happy...price is right watching...playing with my kids mama on the block...full clad in p.j.'s and a good attitude...it was a ball!

apparently i was living it up so much...i didn't snap a one darn picture...not a single one on christmas day...or the day after...and so on...and so on...

but i can tell u we had a ball! just me...e...the kids...and of course charlie...

the biggest news around here on christmas day was the lil lady's new sewing machine and best friend penny...and the lil guy's and edward's new electric guitars...

and me...well...santa edward baby  came up with a scavenger hunt...with riddles and secret messages from the kids...with things hidden throughtout their rooms and what not...and after a few poems...riddles..giggles from the kids...and secret jokes and words (that i had to figure out)...i found this hidden within the kid's toys:

 

 

a new learning toy for me!

i've been curled up...walking around...riding around...everything...with my new best friend to my face...in true nerdy fashion...(though i haven't fallen yet)

i've read about 1,000+ pages already...in the past week...

finished:

1. the help (in 2 1/2 days)

2. twilight, book 1 (in one day!!!)

3. artisan bread in five minutes a day

currently reading:

1. the darkest child

want to read:

1. twilight, books 2, 3 & 4

2. the glass castle: A memoir

3. half broke horses: a true-life novel

4. water for elephants

5. all of jane austen's books...

6. little women

7. little bee: a novel

my list is long...really long...and e is starting to wonder if this was not a good idea...as i've already asked him for a monthly amazon book allowance.

we'll see how that goes for me.

goals...

i love new year resolutions...and i've got them...i've got a lot...but most importantly i want to:

1. sew again...

2. quilt like a maniac

3. cross-stitch and embroider 

4. bake bread regularly

5. plant flowers and bulbs (not just veggies)

6. teach the lil lady to sew (hand and machine)

7. learn how to knit socks (anyone want to take this up with me?)

8. read a number of books a month (as much as i can afford)

9. weave lots of towels

10. write more (poems, mini children's stories)

11. make as many of my own clothes as possible

12. get rid of the mini-blinds still plaguing my windows

13. take the kids to the getty, moca, lacma, griffith park observatory, the brewery art colony, venice beach & la brea tar pits

14. participate in more art shows (not including the one next month)

15. join a quilting bee (preferably one online...any suggestions?)

i really think i could go on...but those are the most pressing...

i have lots of work to jump back to...i have a deadline of the 17th for the upcoming art show i'm in...and i'm literally "into the thick of it" *sings the backyardigans*...

but i will share this:

 

 

e bought me this collection of fat quarters (and some charm packs...and other sewing knic knacks) also..and though i have some quilt patterns that i'm so anxious to do...i just love this fabric collection so much i had to find a pattern that would show off the large scale prints...there was no way i was going to cut this beautiful fabric into little pieces...nope.

so off to the local fabric shop (met some wonderful new quilt friends...)...spotted this quilt on the wall and just couldn't keep my eyes off of it...it features kaffe fasset patterns...and it really shows off large scale designs...so i bought it...and some extra kaffe fasset fabric for the border and binding...and batik for the solid squares...

heaven!

i was informed that quilt shop batiks don't run...none of that madness...so i'm in love on a whole 'nother level...

i cannot wait to get started piecing this quilt! but i have to finish up my art work first..pft! i keep thinking i should just cheat...and do some cutting...but i know...once i get going...stopping will be an issue...so i'm going to wait...sigh. double sigh. wait make that triple sigh.

i hope the new year has came in with lots of peace and joy....and i'm wishing you all a year full of:

peace balance joy health prosperity spirituality creativity 

love & peace...ki

this and that...that and this...let's play catch-up!

i cannot believe its already mid December!! I've taken to writing love letters to my fleeting lover time! as he is truly evading me these days..

its like i'm in a long distance love relationship with time...he comes...fleeting into my life...only to leave me hanging and longing for him to stay around longer.

one day i'll marry time!...until then...i'm happily very busy!

so let's get down to business...what the heck have i been up to to stay away for...i don't want to know how many days?

1. homeschooling still...going well...kids are amazing

2. started going to acupuncture...and its working!! thankfully...

3. wonderful holiday rush, more orders in a couple of weeks than I've ever had (thank you wonderful customers!!)

4. finished up a 3 quilt, quilting commission

5. looking at schools, and wondering when and which way i'll finally finish my degree

6. creating my facebook fan page, won't you join please?

7. tea staining fabric 

8. creating artwork for an upcoming gallery show (February, 2010) on: play

9. and finally creating a bag and writing a corresponding article for haute handbags magazine (woohoo!)

let me be honest here...even though it gets "hairy" sometimes...i crave being busy...i crave it like i crave kisses and hugs from my lil loves...and do-nothing, veg-out time with e...its just better to have something to do..than to sit with idle fingers...staring back at me holding nothing.

now that i'm caught up with shop orders, and i think my holiday rush has passed...i'm happily getting excited and working on all sorts of things...

i'm really excited about the upcoming art show...as i'm going back to cloth...working with art quilts...and falling in love all over again with quilting. this time i'm changing it up...working in smaller dimension...and doing it all by hand (except for piecing some seams).

i'm also excited about the upcoming article in haute handbags...i just sent my article out this morning...and will wait with my fingers crossed, eyes closed and breath held till it comes out. i've been told its coming out in april, 2010...but sometimes these things are held over to another publishing...so we'll see. nothing is set in stone...till its well...set in ink. ha!

the month is almost over...i'm so freaking excited about the holidays i really can't stand it...but i'm excited to get started baking and crafting this week...i've got plans...and plans...and plans...lets see how many of them we i can get done.

I've decided to put together a little picture stroll...of everything that's happened in the past few weeks...what's a post with out tons of pictures?

let's go!

yummy food

vegan cornbread...for my dressing....so tasty!

simi-vegan homemade thanksgiving dinner...only non-vegan item is the chicken (e will not go totally vegan...), this is e's plate...so the candied yams were missing.

p.s. i did make 2 vegan sweet potato pies ( i ate an entire one by myself that weekend...no joke) and a vegan pecan pie...which the boys ate...they were too devoured for pictures...the other sweet potato pie is in the freezer, vacuum sealed (so that I wouldn't have eaten two in the weekend by myself)!

shop stuff:

beautiful tomato red petal bag made for a lovely customer jenn...i ♥ her!

 

front...

back...

inside...

pencil cases...

inside pencil cases...

this lovely set of goods and zakka was made for a wonderful customer's 3 year old daughter. these are some old deer-skin hides from her deceased father...that i made into bags for her (earlier in the year) and now for her daughter...with accompanying pencil cases (2 for her, 2 for her brother)...

this was one of my favorite projects...i channeled my 7-year old self...and designed from things i remember drawing at that age.   

new moo cards...love the new case..though i love the old ones too.

my 3 designs...

 

yogi tea bag tags i've been saving... 

i've been organizing all my embroidery floss as a productive "unwinding, vegging out" project at the end of the evenings...

thanks to a promotion with verizon fios (and good cyber monday sales)...we got a new laptop...for almost free...its not a mac, but i and e have loved using it during the evenings...this means i can finally get his large desktop out of my studio (yay!!!) and have more storage space...and the room officially to myself! 

my only wish for it being mac is so that i could use photoshop on it...so i could blog from it...i have elements...so i'll install that eventually...it is already loaded with eq6 and this!

my side of the bed this morning...and last night...while working on my article...i kept taking breaks to look at the new books i've gotten recently...and brush up on my sewing techniques. i'm being very ambitious in the new year...making all my clothes! stay tuned!

 

i got this wonderfully beautiful card friday night...just because, from the boy...look at the worm in the lower left hand corner...and the lady bug in the sky amidst the falling colored snow...and aren't i cute in my pink dress? that's charlie our bird on the tree limb in case u were wondering...this was the greatest gift!

we decided to homeschool in my studio today...like we did before the kids started kinder...this is today's lesson books that we had to cart upstairs...see why i'm so busy? one day's worth of lessons!

my sweet boy...getting ready for school this morning...in his guitar p.j.'s that he's been refusing to take off until santa brings him his electric guitar...sigh...gotta love childhood...

 

my lil lady...who always comes to class dressed...and accessorized...while me and the lil guy look like bums...she wants to start designing her own clothes...wait till she sees what "santa" brings her to help her with those ambitions!

art work in process...more later on the kikasa blog...

my latest collection...weaving yarns...can't wait to have time to weave again! my towels are already stained up from much use at the dinner table!

 

and finally...a sneak peak of our christmas so far...we got our 2 trees a couple weeks ago...decorated one of them...and will be decorating the other tonight...can't wait to share more christmas pics!

so there...this is the jest of what i've been up too...of course there were wonderful meals that i didn't get to snap pictures of, holiday cookies...and gingerbread dough...rain and hail storms...

its been a rush, these last few weeks...i'm so excited to bring in the new year...to celebrate the holidays...i literally can't stand it! i've never been this excited about a new year...like now!

i'm excited to see what wonderful things the universe and i dream up together!

peace...ki

p.s. i hope to stop this binge...purge..blemic posting schedule that i'm on...but truth is...i can't make any promises...when i do post...i'll make it worth while!! i know i'll be back soon...something special is coming in the mail wednesday...i wonder if you all can guess...one of the pictures gives a good clue!

thanks for accompanying me on this journey...thus far...we're almost 3 years strong!

p.p.s my sis is back! pay her a visit over at www.neosewmama.typepad.com she's had some amazing life changes...wonderful...go tell her hi!
        

running with scissors, i think i need stitches. (not for the squeamish)

this is not the way to start vacation.

i was sitting on the couch about to cut a piece of thread when, e called out to me something was wrong with with the little lady.

i jumped up, simultaneously dropping the scissors, jumping down off the couch on one foot...and apparently my heel landed on top the tip of the scissors.

these are the evil scissors...i think it went in up into the red line drawn on the scissors (at least!). sense my foot is rather translucent...we can see in pretty deep...i think they went in at an angle. 

i ran to the 2 of them to see what was wrong...and while standing there i felt like i was standing in a puddle of water...i shook my foot, lifted it...shook it again...slap it...and then after a few seconds of trying to shake off imaginary water, lint or the wayward crawling ant...i looked down.

my heel was covered in blood...the numbness of my foot was starting to wear off...and i suddenly realized that when i jumped off the couch i didn't just "land wrong" and hit a "funny bone" in my heel or another one of the kids wayward toys...as i thought but i had in fact jumped right onto a very sharp, thick pair of tiny scissors.

trying to stop the bleeding...hopping on one foot...i saw the "water" on the floor and then the scissors laying on the floor next to the couch.

oooh...so when i jumped up, landed and then started "batting at my foot" i was getting the scissors out my foot.

i must really be a mother. i thought.

i was concerned about her...and then instantly saying thank you...

thank you that it was me and no one else in the house...not even e.

i was hoping on one foot trying to stop the bleeding...trying not to bleed everywhere and trying to make sure she was fine.

"are you okay, anything hurts....etc. etc."

e tells me i need to handle my foot and stop the bleeding...i was more concerned with her.

after realizing that she was okay...i turned my attention to my foot.

i know i need stitches...but the thought of carting everyone to the emergency room...30 minutes away, waiting for hours for a good 2-3 stitches just seemed ridiculous.

i heal well. i heal fast.

damit. i thought.

we are suppose to go to lacma and moca and ice skating (again), perhaps bowling and miniature golfing and maybe even to see the elephants.

i can't do all that walking with stitches on the bottom of my foot.

no stitches.

this is it looking good, cleaned up about 5 hours after the incident...but starting to bleed all over again when i walk...as if i'd just did it! urgh!. the entire red length is cut...and runs deep...i think too much of those darn scissors went in my foot!

if i can just manage to find a way to wrap it tightly enough...so that i can walk without opening it up...and starting the bleeding all over again...that would be just awesome. i can deal with the pain.

craft related injuries often make you think..."what was i thinking" "why didn't i do x, y, z"..." or "why did i...."

this reminds me of when i got my finger stuck under the needle on my sewing machine! while sewing!

has anyone ever cut the bottom of their foot? really bad? how did you wrap it? stop the bleeding?

suggestions?

okay...i'm hoping off...literally!

peace...ki

*really i need suggestions...twitter me some pleaseeeeee!!! i don't want to spend my vacation hopping*

:'(

let's fly....

i'm so happy/proud to say...I'm : 

fly girl of the week

i love what andrea does over at fly...she has an amazing sense of style, a wonderful eye...and brings something so positive and wonderful to the 'nets...if you've never been...fly on over to fly....i promise you with all my heart you'll love it!

i'm warning you...you'll be inundated with the some of the most beautiful and inspiring eye candy!

have a wonderful day!

paz, ki

india.aire...my super duper shero

india.aire

i find myself here searching my thoughts for the right words...the right composition...structure...to express my gratitude...love and admiration for such a beautiful, talented and spiritual woman.

i find myself returning to the same thought...she inspires me.

its amazing to have a person create music that expresses your thoughts...your heart...the love that pushes the blood through your heart.

its been almost a week since i saw her friday..in concert...and i still find myself struggling with how to express my experience.

she song her heart out...shared her soul, song with and kissed musiq (friendship kiss!) (first time they song together on stage she said)...and she bought her beautiful mother on stage who song for us...(it was evident why she's as beautiful inside and out..her mother is absolutely amazing...beautiful voice)

and...

me, india.aire and tiffany (brother's girlfriend)

i somehow...stumbled on the most wonderful opportunity of going backstage and meeting her...i can only call it divine intervention...i looked at her...said a prayer of thanks...and asked God to make it possible for me to connect with her...one day and thank her.

little did i know...less than an hour later..i'd be hugging her. i'd have the chance to meet the wonderful guy who helped her right songs that i've named my children after (he even kissed my hand!)

she shared with us that her super-duper hero...was nina simone...i wanted to tell her she was my nina simone...and my art is made with my hands..instead of my voice...

i wanted to tell her that her music inspires my art...my handbags...my passions...my goals are mirrored in her music...but...

i had less than 60 seconds...

i love that my shero...is a woman...the same age as me...the same heart as me...a woman who's young but wise...a woman that succeeded by being "not the average girl from the video" but a woman who followed her heart...her soul...and stayed true to the she that she wants to be.

i'm sure i'm not the only one who's been touched and inspired by her music...and that makes my heart swell even more...

so here i am...listening to my super-duper shero...feeling creatively alive...and believing that i can be:

she who follows her heart...she who has wisdom, soul...love, spirit...i can be...free.

my wish is for all women to find their:

"strength, courage and wisdom!"

love...ki