3 quilts that surrounded me as i wrote my research paper. this was taken during the writing of the first draft. a saturday afternoon.
i know it's not quite right of me to have a blog that i effectively seem to ignore. truth is days run forward, marching like ants carrying crumbs to a hole in a wall. each day steady and in line, obedient, moving forward not minding nothing but the destination of night.
(summer heat makes me think of ants)
each day is so steady filled with work, things, children, school, something to keep me moving forward. i think there was a time when i could hold multiple things in my mind, juggle thoughts on top of thoughts, on top of actions, on top of everything else life manages to create. but that isn't so these days.
i've let go of minute things, grand things, fancy things, festering things and have managed to just let myself be concerned with the things that need taking care of today.
gratitude prayer. kids. me. edward. kids eat. school work. me eat. e's school work. the twin's coming. the twin's mama. kids eat. kids bored. school work. e's school work. everybody eat. school work. the twin's coming. the twin's mama. mama. brother. sister. school work. e's schoolwork. the twin's coming. kids. kids eat. schoolwork. art class? schoolwork. kids ride bikes? schoolwork. kids make crafts? schoolwork. kids learn times tables? schoolwork. kids eat again? schoolwork. hi mama. schoolwork. e's school work. schoolwork. the twin's mama. schoolwork. knit the twins hats? schoolwork. hi nina. schoolwork. mama... tio mykey's calling. schoolwork. sleep.
that is the constant train of thoughts running through my head. a complete, and constant loop.
did you read closely? yeap..twins are coming in the family. boy and girl...and oooh the things i want to make for them.
but did you catch my non subtle drift? schoolwork. yeap. constant loop, everything is ordered in some way or another around schoolwork.
candied maple leaf quilt, jersey fabric. pieced this the last week of june after finishing the big paper.
gee's bend quilt kit i pieced the last week of june, it was to celebrate the paper i had just finished.
as with the last blog...so much has happened since the last time i've set fingernails to keyboard:
1. kid's got bikes.
2. wrote a 20 page paper on african american women writers and quilters.
3. found a church home. yay mag.!
4. read two shakespeare plays.
5. e finished 2 classes. starting 3rd.
6. finished four classes. in fifth and sixth. both of which are finally major (english) classes.
7. sewed 2 quilt tops together.
8. taught my first class at ucr extension.
9. wrote my first prose poetry piece.
10. made homemade blackberry barbecue sauce.
11. made my first macaroni salad.
12. thought about the day granma died, tried writing about it. cried but eeked out some words.
13. cleaned out half of the garage.
14. hung cheap curtains in the front room and the kid's room so that the only dirty, white, mini blinds left in the house is in me and e's room. small victory.
15. finally replace the broken t.v. me and e have been watching for the past year and the half with the top of people's head cut off.
16. made a chicken salad that almost made me gag, but the kid's and e liked.
17. ate about 8 cantaloupes, and about 15 lbs. of green grapes with the kid's help.
18. learned to like, maybe even love fresh blueberries.
19. have my mama tell me we are a match made in heaven because i love to write and she loves to read.
20. ate sun-warmed blackberries from the backyard that made my knees buckle.
21. made a peach cobbler.
22. start reading bird by bird again. along with poemcrazy (first time).
23. attend my niece's quinceria (I know spelling is off but i'm being lazy..), meet my brother's cute dog einstein who scared the gas out of me, to which i went upstairs to keep company with his girlfriend.
24. bought the kids water colors, made them make a color wheel by mixing their own colors, and then set them free to paint as they wished.
25. kid's spent a day with abuelita while i taught class mentioned in #8, which was more a huge accomplishment for me than them.
i know i'm leaving something out. but i had to draw the line and stop somewhere. the point is that so much happens, so many little things that i want to find ways to capture but I just don't always have time. one day they are big things, the next day they are minuscule in comparison to the current day.
i also don't travel with my camera anymore. that really effects my blogging. i just don't have the time and patience to carry and compose shots outside of my iphone most days.
the bad thing with all of this is that i sit here to write and everything comes pouring out at once. i want to say so much.
like that i'm taking a shakespeare and creative writing class right now. and how reading shakespeare feels like walking on a beach with flip flops. each step takes muscle, but you know you are surrounded by something to be revered so you step on...hot sand and all.
like how i had a huge, breakthrough in a story this morning. and how i'm so excited that i had to just write something to keep me from eating cheap lemon sandwich cookies and cold cantaloupe slices. and how the story is coming to me in bits and pieces, snatches of dialogue, images of streets and people walking, carrying on with their business while life dances around them in a tight jig.
like how i finally know. writing is the definitive me. and how i hear dialogue and see characters walking around me, living their lives or how at times they pester me tapping me on my arm saying "i'm ready to tell you that little bit now" when i'm in line at the grocery store or the boy, girl and me are playing sequence, or i'm in shakespeare class drawing conclusions about old england.
like how amazed i am with my children and how patient and kind they have been to me and e as we have had to commit so much of our (family) time to homework. and how going to church has been something they love and look forward to. and how they have become a part of our school life. i read shakespeare to them when they are bored now, they like the sonnets more than the plays.
like how me and e faked like we had "furniture shopping" money and went to a few local furniture stores with the kids window shopping. and how we haven't had new couches since we bought our first place in 1999, a condo...and then bought a house in 2000 to which we added a couch and even then we could only afford ikea. so that our "furniture" (if you can call it that) is old, raggedy, slightly embarrassing and worn with kid stains and marks. and how now we feel sort of grown up because we hung curtains and put our feet down and told the kids "no more toys in the living/dinning room." but truth is we can only do so much on so little of a budget, so patience reigns.
like how i think we have finally settled into a rhythm with both me and e being in school though he still waits to the last week to write his papers which means i get stressed out along with him and pull all-nighters along with him. and how though we got it now, on 8/15 the kids will be starting school and things will be disrupted all over again as i try and balance homeschooling with meschooling and eschooling and what ever things life seem fit to throw our way.
one of the mini quilts I'll be teaching how to make in this weekend's class.
there's a lot of living going on in my life. a lot of excitement. a lot of easing up of tension, doubt, worry and just moving with a sense of faith and trust.
i don't know how i'm going to get where i need to go in this life. i just figure i'll write, quilt, bake and garden till i get there. see what comes. see what images pop and strike my fancy while the train moves. see what stories scream the loudest to be told and what pictures demand to be made and hung on my walls.
hope this finds you well.
the happy ki
p.s. all pictures taken on iphone. not bad, eh?

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