a pieced and quilted life

i may be a black girl, but i make a sweet pan dulce...

 

homemade pan dulce 

lately i've been missing my granma's cooking. i miss her but its like grief takes turns switching from one thing to miss to the next and well the past week or two its been her food.

i think about the long talks i'd have with her, and she'd tell me about the days she would cook and clean for this rich jewish family in beverly hills...she'd tell me about the way they loved her food. her chicken salad with apple...and how she'd garnish it and dress it all up so nicely. i think about them and wonder if they remember her food like i do.

must do. she'd tell me that they told her she should open up a restaurant her food was so good.

ox tail stew, skillet cornbread, mac n' cheese (or mac as she started calling it), potato salad, greens, black eye peas, eggs n' grits, spaghetti...

i recently wrote a short scene about her making me & my brother peanut butter and jelly sandwiches...and i'm sure oatmeal or malt o' meal will creep into my writing next.

i don't even eat red meat...but i want ox tail stew this fall and winter. just to have a taste of life with her again.

it got me thinking.

i started to think of all the foods she'd cook for us and i started comparing it to all the things i cook for my family...and i started to realize how much soul food i cook for my family. 

and then i started thinking about the kids favorite foods...cornbread, stuffin', mac n' cheese, cabbage, (sweet) potato pies, peanut butter n' jelly, malt o' meal, cream of wheat and oatmeal...

i'm passing her down...i'm passing down the culture, the food, the love she taught me to cook with. i don't cook the way she did, i've learned to veganize or make things healthier (if they need it)...but the flavors...the love is all still there.

so why did i make pan dulce after making biscuits yesterday?

well, i was thinking about her breakfast of eggs, grits, bacon and biscuits and decided to make some homemade biscuits.

the biscuits didn't visually turn out too great (so no pics), they didn't rise as they should of because i added more milk than necessary and didn't cut them right (thanks nina for schooling me on biscuit cutting) but they taste good...real good...and the kids and e loved them.

a little piece of granma i thought.

well then  as i was making them, i thought about e and his childhood...and the things he loved as a boy...particularly...

 

pan dulce.

mexican sweet bread. 

so. good.

and so i made some. i made some so that the kids will have their southern black roots and their mexican roots in their taste buds. so that they can one day recall...when they are older...what their heritage taste like.

recipes and family foods are so important. food is so much a part of who we are. it is our culture. it is how we show love and nourish our families.

i want them to know mexican food...even more so...birria, sopa, frijoles...real mexican tacos (as e says), tamales, sopa de pescado...all the foods my suegra cooks...good food. like fried potato tacos and (vegan) cheese enchiladas. i want them to learn how to make tamales at her kitchen table like i have...and tortillas too.

it all is so important. food and culture is so important.

so e promises to make more of his mexican tacos. the ones he remembers from his mother's kitchen. and i promise to continue making black eye peas, cabbage, and cornbread.

and we promise to have my suegra come over this year and us video tape her making tamales...and have her teach us again (though together we can piece it together).

and i promise to call my papa, my mama and my aunt patty up when i need instructions on granma's recipes...and like she did, they can coach me through them...even if i think i know...i promise to call. 

it is all so important. to hold on to who we are...where we come from...and the food of our people.

i may be a black girl, but i make a sweet pan dulce. e says it is better than what he remembered, the bread softer...sweeter. its the love i put into...the love that granma taught me to cook with. 

he ate one up...and then kissed me..."thank you baby...can't wait to eat this for breakfast tomorrow."

be luv,

ki

my garden/life

 

yummy cabbage covered with rainwater...some of the leaves have been chomped on since tues. when this was taken

i'm learning that keeping up with a garden is like keeping up with busy bees...it is constantly in a changing state...growing, moving...and constantly stuff to tend to and with.

this past weekend me and e worked hard establishing a new bed...this one is situated in the back of our yard (on the east side...running from north to south) up against the neighbor's fence. 

i've been wanting to establish an all herb-garden, but while researching and looking for inspiration online I "sort of kinda of" fell in love with flower gardens too. we have been wanting to plant "flora" that attracts butterflies, bees and more beneficial friends...and give the mischievous bird neighbors of our something to "play" in. they've been pulling my studio screen window apart...using it to build nest in the trees up against the fence. 

we also have a resident "hummingbird friend" as the kids call him that visits us throughout the day...he loves our sage bush, and the flower vine growing up the kitchen window to my bedroom and studio window. i got about 5 different sage varieties so he'll have lots of stuff to feed on. i noticed a couple of weeks ago that he has a teeny tiny nest in a tree in our front yard.

 

 

our new beds, top: (taken from my bedroom window) the raised one is housing our corn, melons, half our squash and some gourd plants...bottom: the newly planted herb, flower and a artichoke garden. *notice all those potted tomato plants on the raised bed...i think i have about 14/15 of them (some are small pots in the bed) 

i planted:

stevia, oregano, cilantro, basil, lavender, sage, chamomile, thyme, marjoram, nasturtiums, cilantro, bay, a couple of artichoke plants, a blueberry bush and a raspberry plant, . and a number of different perennial flowers. 

in the existing vegetable beds i've planted a ton of melon plants...i'm guessing 15 or so...watermelon, honeydew, cantaloupe, muskmelon. we ate melons daily last summer...so i figured cut the cost and grow our own. i'm anxious to make some melon sorbet this summer!

i've also put more corn seed in, and will be planting more squash varieties. i've got a variety that grows little squash balls, a honey acorn squash, and sweet pie pumpkin. i'm going to try my hand at bush beans too.

i spent about an hour planting up all those tomato seeds I planted in early april...i've got so many tomato plants...i really need to give some away..i have no room. local takers?

 

  

 some of my new garden residents...flowers

the more i garden...the more i need to garden...it has become my personal refuge. i know this year will be the year i finally start gardening year round. i told e, that i really want to live a more self-sustaining life. really. eating out of our garden is so rewarding...and not to mention healthier. 

i want to learn how to can and preserve this summer and also how to make some personal care items like lip balm, shampoo...and hand creams and body oils. i have so much stuff growing i need to find ways of using it all.

i grew up with a large fruit and vegetable garden, pet geese...my grandparents were share-croppers from the south...living in south central l.a. didn't stop them from living peacefully with the earth. i'm trying to raise my family that way.

 

top: my brussels sprouts...they are so green and healthy...except for the holes from the grasshopers chomping on them....or is the snails...or earwigs...or rollie pollies? i have pests this year! urgh! bottom: i finally snagged a pair of liberty of london rain boots...they are sooo comfy and warm...and was on sale too!

we've had our first harvest of the season...a mini one...a couple of squashes (round grey zucchini and the traditional zucchini). i'm not surprised...we tend to grow squash and tomatoes like nobody's business around here...the tomatoes are soon to follow...they are about 3 feet tall...and i have a few large green ones slowly making their way towards ripe. 

we made what will probably be the last pot of chicken/vegetable soup for a while...i also threw in some time and made a "vintage southeren caramel cake" from scratch, with eggs. you know how long its been since i've baked with eggs? me neither...a few years i'm guessing. the cake turned out okay...the icing recipe was not so great...and after two batches of not so right caramel sauce...i realized it may not be me...looked up recipes on the 'nets...and realized it probably is the recipe. i made lemonade though and turned the so-so caramel sauce to caramel "un-butter" buttercream icing...could of been better...but certainly wasn't horrible.

i miss baking cakes...baking in general...so i'm planning on doing more right away...and regularly.

 

top: first squash harvest...middle: chicken, veggie, pasta soup...flavored with bay, thyme, rosemary and marjoram....bottom: vintage southern caramel cake   

i've gotten into a fairly good daily rhythm, i write as soon as i open my eyes...usually for a couple of quiet hours until the kids wake up or the ideas run dry and then i've been spending my late mornings out in the garden...usually i'm walking in by 1 pm with my fingers and finger nails covered in dirt...my feet wet and soggy with dirt...and my pants dirty. 

the kids usually make their way out back and forth to the garden...potting random seeds or roots they find, foraging for rocks to turn into "rock pets" or just for collecting...and playing tag...they're also learning how to make their own pb & j sandwiches...all i have to do is scoop it onto the bread...and they do the spreading...its amazing how just this little bit of self-know-how makes them feel so "big kid" and how much time it frees up for me.

my afternoon and evenings are not as smooth...i've been volunteering so that takes away a couple of usable hours here and there...and i've been going to school...both online (ucla extension) and on weekends at riverside's university extension. 

my time is spread thin...between everything...but my happiness is full. 

i'm going to try and update more regularly...regarding the garden...it literally changes overnight these days! as this school year comes to a close (i'm literally preparing the kids last quarter turn-ins as we speak) i'm sure i'll have much, much, much, much, much, much more time. at least i hope!

have a wonderful friday!

be peace...ki

i'm baking a vintage caramel cake from scratch to celebrate this...

i’m sitting in my bed, legs crossed and enclosed in freshly washed sheets and a wild-flower printed duvet typing and watching the rain fall in light sheets over my earth.

the rain in may falls like gossamer politely nourishing my outside beds and me in my inside bed. i have to be still to catch it.

i have to be quiet to hear it.

i have to be sensitive to feel it.

so i sit. i sit with my hips planted firmly, my elbows resting on my knees…and my fingers dancing in front of me on a tiny keyboard.

this is my happy life.

gossamer may mornings…staged underneath grey clouds surrounded by green beds.
sitting in fresh, pale pink sheets underneath a down blanket covered in a 10 year-old, wild flower printed ikea duvet cover

i am happy with gossamer grey sheets.

i have to sit still…look out and watch. i must be still and listen.

listen to my voice…listen to my words and the conversations i type out.

if i’m still i can catch a drop…and watch it travel quickly towards the bed and into me.

this morning i woke up early  laying on edward’s pillow. i started to write poems in my head for him:
                                   

i wake up and find myself laying where u left...even in sleep i seek the heat of you to warm me and rub my aching hip joints till i fall back to sleep.

I smell you even in freshly laundered sheets...i can feel your slick shiny black hair tickle my nose.

when i'm up a 3 am and your laying facing me...intently breathing in and out...quietly snooring in your own way...i whisper "i love you and you say "i love you more"

how can you answer me in your sleep?

i'm just content to lay my head next to yours and feel your hair on my cheek.

when i'm cold i stretch out my legs and let them wonder to the east, where you lay...you let me rest my cold knees on your hips and twine my feet and toes between your legs.

you warm me and i tickle you.

so i'm still. i lay still so you can sleep.

you are my sun and i am your cold earth...you be summer and i be winter.

we together are a cycle of sames and differents.

we are nature -- a landscape mix of nappy and straight, amber honey and white dandelion sap, tall stretching trees and short wide squash bushes.

we set out runners in wild earth sprouting our hybrid seedlings who grow different from us.

we are the riot and violence of nature tucked beneath the warmth and cold of earth peacefully growing. if they sit quietly they'll see us put on a show.

                                           -------------------------

our bed faces north. every morning mon-fri. i find myself laying on edward’s pillow…laying in the east with the rising sun on my face waking up cause he’s not there. halfway in slumber i sort of wake up as soon as he is out of the bed…searching and moving east to find him.

he tries to get dressed quietly, brushing his teeth with the water off…quietly removing his pressed white shirt and tie from hangers, and slowly getting dressed. he combs and slicks his hair back in the downstairs bathroom…where charlie our bird sleeps. he doesn’t want to wake me, but i don’t want him to leave.

if he sees my eyes are open, he’ll come over and kiss my forehead before he leaves the room.

“bye babe.”

i still hate it. hate that everyday is not a weekend morning that he is here when i wake up.

i love him. but he says he loves me more. i want to take offense to that but after 12 years of going back and forth i don’t.

i’m just happy that he helps me grow.

i’m happy that he talks with me during the day from work and listens to my housewife drama.

i’m happy that he comes straight home from working overtime and plants my blueberry bush and helps me cover my new herb and flower bed with tree bark mulch.

i’m happy that at the end of the night, he lets me pick out all the splinters his hands gathered, even though he’s too manly for doting.

i’m happy that he allows me to nurture him in this small way.

i picked out the tiny, invisible splinters with his big pink, calloused hands in my small, brown, soft slender hands and thought, “i love the care and keeping of you” quietly to myself as i twisted his wide right thumb back and forth looking for more slithers of wood. i looked up to see if he knew what i was thinking.

“ki, i can just wash them out” he answers to my eyes. i insist on picking them.

my hands are softer, yet his collected all the tiny pieces of wood. fitting. this is how he always protects me. this is how he always has an answer to the question of me in his life.

“i love you more.”

-ki

rustic vegan cheesecake...a classic

 

yesterday, nov. 23 happens to be one of those special days...the day my e was born...the kids and i spent the day decorating, and making cheesecake...his special request (along with burritos...)

after searching around for and looking at different vegan cheesecake recipes, i finally found myself torn between three...one from native foods restaurant (which i have the cookbook) and a couple i found on vegweb...

i decided to make the best of all worlds...and hope like the dickens it came out right (and i had enough time for it to set).

the results are heavenly.

pure, simple, rustic....cheesecake heaven. whether your vegan or not...a cheesecake fan or not...delicious!

here's the recipe...try it for yourself if your so inclined:

 

rustic vegan cheesecake

crust

1 3/4 c. crushed graham cracker crumbs

1/2 c. melted margarine

1 tbl. cinnamon

2 tsp. sugar

filling

1 c. (8 oz.) tofutti soy sour cream

2 8 oz. packages of tofutti cream cheese (i prefer this one)

1 c. sugar

2 tbl. a.p. flour

1 tbl. ener-g egg replacer powder (no water added)

1 tbl. fresh lemon juice

1 tbl. vanilla extract

1 vanilla bean (the insides...slit the pod open and scrape the tiny seeds out and into the bowl)

1 tsp. sea salt

directions:

1. preheat the oven to 325°. melt the margarine and set a side to cool. grind the graham crackers into crumbs in a blender or food processor until you have a powder consistency. mix graham powder, cinnamon and sugar in a bowl. add the melted butter and mixed until the margarine is throughly mixed in. press the mixture into a 9-inch spring-form pan. (u can use a deep dish pie pan if you haven't got a spring-form pan) set aside.

2. to make the filling: measure out all of the ingredients into a large bowl. mix until just combined and smooth. be careful not to over mix your filling as over beating leads to cracks in your cheesecake. pour the filling into the prepared pan. Bake for 35-60 minutes.

baking cheesecake is probably the most difficult part of the process...oven temperatures vary...and some take shorter or longer to cook...couple that with it staying "jiggly" until it sets in the refridge...it can be hard to tell when its done.

i baked mine for a very long time...well over 60 minutes as you can tell by the browned top. i checked it every 5 minutes after about 45 minutes. 

the best advice is to take it out when the edges seems to be set and don't jiggle as much as the center...which will set when cooled. i also made sure the top didn't brown too much...so once it was an even light brown..i pulled it.

also, the cheesecake will puff-up and as it cools on the counter...will slowly, but noticeably shrink down.

3. cool on a cooling rack for about 20 minutes, or until room temperature. wrap it in saran wrap and then place in the refridge to chill completely and set. this can take anywhere between a few hours and 12 hours, again depends on your refridge. i placed mine in my freezer which goes down to -12° for about an hour...then transferred it to the refridge which is -34° for another few hours. 

enjoy!

i seem to finally be on a baking roll these days...the holiday time of the year most certainly does that to me...i'm looking forward to finally perfecting my vegan sweet potato pie recipe this year. i perfected sweet potato pie years ago, but once i started baking vegan...i've never managed to get mines to set properly. i've continuously ended up with the best sweet potato custard/pudding...in a great crust. i want pie! i've got enough know-how and experience this year i believe to set it off...literally. can't wait!

peace, ki

recipe try: vegan lemon bundt cake

 

vegan lemon bundt cake w/vanilla glaze

my quest to make a wonderfully...perfect vegan pound/bundt cake has not...and doesn't seem to be coming to end...the catch is..i don't want to use soy or tofu.

last night i had a craving for a lemon pound cake...not exactly fall eats...but with the heat wave were experiencing it didn't seem too off.

i pulled out my joy of vegan baking book, and decided to give this recipe a try. i'd wanted to try it for some time now, but because it uses maple syrup as its sweetener...i've put it off. a while ago, when i first started making vegan baked goods i tried a cake recipe that called for maple syrup and it was less than stellar...it was heavy and the flavor just wan't that great...so since then i've been literally scared of baking with maple sugar.

my solution? i substituted the 3/4 c. of maple sugar with 1 c. of granulated sugar. and followed the recipe pretty much to a t. (except for switching the ratios of lemon and vanilla extract - instead of 1tbl. of lemon and 1 1/2 tsp. of vanilla...i did 1 tbl. of vanilla and 1 1/2 tsp. of lemon)

the recipe calls for 1/3 of a cup of lemon juice, along with lemon rind...so i was afraid it would be too tart.

the cake also called for an interesting egg replacement...it called for 4 energy eggs...along with baking soda and baking powder...hmmmm. i thought...maybe that's the solution..a combination...of "faux" eggs...

 

the outcome

first off the cake held together...there were a few cracks...but i let the cake cool throughly in the pan (usually i don't so it won't sweat at the bottom) before turning it out...and it was fine...held together great...which is good because when a vegan cake goes wrong the first thing to go is structure.

the crumb of the cake is coarse and dense...i guess i suspected this. it isn't off putting...just a bit more rustic. makes me miss the fine crumb of my vegan cupcakes.

the flavor was...."understated." in e's words...definitely edible and "good" just doesn't live up to my 7-up cake (which packs in 5 or 6 whole eggs). i'm wondering if my little tift with the flavorings could clear up the taste...it was definetly on the right track just not overly sweet...and a bit understated. this could be a good thing depending on what your going after.

 

my final thoughts? 

i'm thinking this is definitely a great jumping off spot...this recipe seems to me to have some legs and may be able to turn into a lovely non-soy vegan pound cake...its just going to take some tweeking...the flavors...and also the order in which its mixed...i'm wondering if since i replaced the syrup with granulated sugar if i should have not mixed the sugar with the wet ingredients...i did because i know that sugar can be considered a "wet" ingredient in some baking recipes...so i'll try a different method next time.

the other thing to consider is the size...its a smaller bundt cake...certainly didn't take up all of the pan, and didn't bake tall...i'm wondering if it could be doubled...but the thought of 8 ener-g eggs in a cake recipe scares me...really.

 all and all..i'd consider this a successful work in process...

if any of you would love to work with me on experimenting with this recipe...let me know...who knows what we can do if we put our baking brains together!

peace....ki

a little bit more...

just wanted to share:

my addiction to veggie chips...if you haven't tried any of these...please do they are soooo good in a healthy sort of way...especially the snappea crisps...and veggie booty (my favorite)...

the dwindling supply of veggies coming from the garden...i've yet to cook eggplant...anyone wanna suggest a recipe? those are mostly heirloom tomatoes...green and unripe (before the birds get em) and one large bell pepper...like the eggplant...the bell pepper waited to really late in the season to take off...

we think we'll have tomatoes through the end of this month...we'll see...they usually carry on till november but...its gotten colder earlier this fall...the news is forecasting an 'el nino year...uh oh!

 

my first vegan bundt cake!!! well...if you don't count the chocolate one i've been making now for years.

i got this recipe out of the book above...the 100 best vegan baking recipes....

it doesn't have any soy/tofu or egg replacer eggs...it is suppose to be a vanilla/chocolate swirl with chocolate chips throughout.

i think i unevenly measured half of the batter for the chocolate...cause it is a bit more chocolate than vanilla. either way it is good...i will say that i will add a bit more vanilla next time (recipe only calls for 1 tsp. and i think 2 would heighten the vanilla flavor) and make sure i measure half and half of the batter for chocolate/vanilla.

it is good...sort of like a chocolate chip cookie cake...

and it gives me hope that alas i'll be able to bake a vegan cake/pound cake without tofu...

i've got more posting to do later...if i can get to it...we had a wonderful field trip week before last...and the weaving is progressing along well...my first project will be done in a few days...

i'm still wondering if i should start a separate blog for my works in progress, etc. just feels like i should...again...i guess we'll see...i'm not too good with handling one blog..let alone multiples...

peace...ki

still thinking...i should...

"a beautiful surprise"

ooh how i love his underbite...he's now 5 years old!

everything about him...everything about his being...the way he came to me...the way he's lived his life...everything has been...

a beautiful surprise...

my son.

my beautiful son...came to my life january of '04, i was still a new mother, just celebrating 1 year with yael when i couldn't stop craving pb & j...which would be followed by an oppressing wave of sickness...i was a couple of weeks away from my 27th birthday...and just barely believing i could do this "mother thing."

pregnancy was the last thing on my mind as i was told i couldn't "conceive" on my own...i didn't even have monthly cycles...

when i found out i was "with child" again, i was terrified. i knew i wasn't ready...i was barely beginning to "warm up" to motherhood...and starting to enjoy it. i was a worry wart of a new mother, and suffering with a bit of post-partum blues while i tried to make sense of my new life as a sahm.

my mother told me it would be wonderful. my husband grinned from ear to ear. my sister said "awww, ki it'll be good...don't worry." and my best friend cos accompanied me to get prenatal vitamins and tried to "cheer" me up by taking pictures of me building my first panel...

i wasn't convinced...but over time...maybe a week or two...i settled. i knew that it would be difficult..but somehow that didn't matter. my wonderful daughter will have a playmate...and hopefully a best friend too.

it didn't matter to me boy or girl...i just wanted healthy.

i would converse with my lil friend in my belly...and ask that "it" be patient with me. i warned "it" that i wasn't a very good mother...but i had some good points...i was funny and quirky, i loved to bake and cook...i was an artist...and i was willing...willing to give it my all. i also pointed out to this being that it would have a really cute big sister...and a wonderful 'papa'

in the wee morning of september  27th...i couldn't stop cleaning...from about midnight until 5 am...i cleaned...when i finally layed down at 5am...less than a minute later i heard and felt a pop...and my water broke...we were at the hospital within the hour...with me having serious contractions...and by 9:20am he came. he wasn't due to early oct.

he came. fast.

so fast he broke his collarbone during delivery.

everything about my son has been fast. he walked at 11 months...talked at a year...and from the start had an obvious sense of humor.

he was "joking" with us from about 4 months...he would watch yael...follow her with his eyes and then "do" things to interact with her...and cause a laugh.

5 years later.

today michael yosef is:

the kind of boy that makes you dream of the man he'll be. he's charming and witty...yet incredibly sensitive and loving. he's funny and full of jokes and loves to laugh heartedly from his belly out. he loves food and eating...dreams of being able to cook and constantly accompanies me in the kitchen. he loves to read...and is often found with a book, this year before entering kindergarten he placed in 4th grade in reading...he devours words and reading...he loves to build things...particularly with legos and with papa...he also loves cars, shiny cars, futuristic cars.

he also loves to say "i love u," he loves to tell me how much he loves me...and how wonderful i am as a mom...as if he remembers those conversations i had with him in-utero...as if reassuring me. 

he's thoughtful...he's hilarious...he's a beautiful surprise.

i'm thankful.

the best kind of birthday.

intently trying to figure out his new ben-10 watch

so yesterday we as a family celebrated his birth. it was the best kind of birthday to have. one that focuses on life. we spent time with family...stayed home together...and played.

he choose papa's "egg breakfast" of scrambled eggs, hashbrowns, turkey bologna and toast for breakfast, homemade vegan-like pizza for dinner, and vegan chocolate cake with raspberry filling and vanilla "butter"cream icing...

he got to choose what he wore...and also helped me ice and make the cake...

he spent the afternoon building new lego cars with papa...and watching coraline...for the 2nd time with yali...

mykey and abuelito...

he played with abuelito and abuelita...laughed and played with balloons...took a long nap...and told me over and over how wonderful his birthday was.

this is the best kind of birthday...feeling loved, special and happy...feeling like nothing is every better...

this is the kind of birthday i love to give my children...reminding them of how they came to us...their birth story...reminding them of how they've grown...celebrating them...

it was the best way of celebrating life...

here are more pictures from yesterday:

 big sis...with 2 teeth missing...

blowing out his candle later...(some how the #5 candle that i bought got misplaced)

she got a "lil" gift too...i don't like leaving the other child out...

leftover birthday dinner...soy cheese pizza with veggies and pineapples...

vegan chocolate cake with raspberry filling and vanilla "butter"cream icing...may not look like it, but it was heavenly...

have a wonderful day...and make sure you celebrate life!

peace, ki

autumn crumb cake

i started making this crumb/coffee cake back in 2000...i was a newly wedded woman, in love with my man and despite it not being my first "home" on my own...our condo felt like it. i felt decidedly like a woman. i had a husband, a large kitchen, a "spare" bedroom, a master bedroom...and freedom to run a house...as i saw fit...for more than just me.

i was instantly "the black martha" as i was called at "work." i say "work" because i, full of ambition and idealism left a really good paying job, that allowed me freedom to craft and do homework during work hours...with people who were literally family to me...to join the americorps. 

i became a vista...i wanted to change the world...and although i loved being a "media technician" the perks and money was great...i knew that i wasn't changing the world. that was not ok for me...before being a "media technician" i was an adult ged instructor...my atttention span in the "film library" as a media technician was doomed from the start...

anyway...so there i was "the black martha" of riverside county's economical development agency. i baked. i baked. i baked.

one day i caught a "martha" episode where she proclaimed this to be the most fabulous of coffee cakes. i hadn't had a great one in ions...since the days of eating school lunches in south central...so i printed and tried the recipe.

not tasting it first (didn't want to ruin the presentation), i baked it up and took it to work the next morning. of course my cubicle was the place to stop by for baked goods...i gave out samples...saved a piece for myself and then got to work.

once i tasted it i was horrified...it was dry...bland and nothing like martha had described...i was literally mortified...but to my surprise...my phone and email was blowing up...everyone loved the cake...and soon it was requested often.

well...long story short...i kept the recipe...everyone loved it but me...

its been with me through 10 wonderful years of marriage, and now its my go-to quick treat for my kids. its seen me through fat (eating with all the dairy i could manage) and the lean (now baking solely vegan) and i've finally got a version that i like, one that reminds me of the coffee cakes we loved at school...all of you from lausd will know what i'm talking about...its just a bit more refined if you ask me...so i'm renaming it:

l.a. crumb/coffee cake

ingredients:

::topping::

2 1/2 c. flour

1 c. brown sugar

1 1/2 tsp. cinnamon

2 sticks of vegan margarine

::cake::

(dry)

3 c. flour

1 c. sugar

5 tsp. baking powder

1 tsp. salt

t tsp. cinnamon

"pinch" ground ginger

1/4 tsp. cardamon

1/4 tsp. freshly grated nutmeg (trust me freshly grated makes a difference)

(wet)

2 ener-g egg replacer eggs (1 tbl. powder, 4 tbl. really hot water)

4 tbl. canola oil

1 c. vanilla rice milk

1 1/2 tbl. vanilla extract

::directions::

1. preheat oven to 350 degrees. prepare (grease and flour or spray with baking spray..i prefer the spray) a 8x8 or 9x9 square pan, set aside.

2. prepare the topping. melt the "butter," while butter is melting mix the flour, brown sugar and cinnamon in a medium sized bowl. whisk to make sure all ingredients are evenly blended. once "butter" is melted, pour into bowl and with a fork blend all ingredients together. the mixture will be a thick "crumb," very dense. set aside.

3. prepare cake. make the "eggs" first. measure out the dry egg mix into a small bowl, add the water (as hot as it will run from your tap) to the dry powder and then mix quickly with a fork or whisk. make sure to "scrap" the sides. set aside to "gel." 

in a large bowl, shift together the flour, sugar, baking powder, salt and spices (dry ingredients). sift and whisk together good, making sure all the ingredients and spices are well distributed.

in a small bowl, combine the "eggs," "milk," oil, and vanilla. whisk well.

make a well in the center of the dry ingredients and slowly pour the wet ingredients into the well. using a rubber spatula, fold the wet into the dry ingredients, working quickly but delicately. you don't want to "over work" the batter. once there is no more dry flour...stop.

this is a very thick batter, lumpy somewhere between biscuit and pancake batter.

4. pour the batter into the prepared pan, and using the spatula spread the batter evenly over the pan. pour the crumb on top and evenly spread it over the top.

5. bake in the center of the oven for 10 minutes, then rotate the pan counter clockwise a half a turn. bake an additional 15-20 minutes...checking often after 15 minutes for doneness with a toothpick. the cake is done when a toothpick comes out clean when inserted in the center of the cake. let cool slightly. once it is fully cooled, or right before serving dust with powdered sugar (if its still warm the sugar will melt).

this cake is generally served straight from the pan...and is really good slightly warm and even better once it cools to room-temp. it keeps well, covered out on a counter and can also be refrigerated if you'd like. there is no ingredients to "spoil" so we keep ours out on the counter, sealed air-tight and its usually good for a good few days.

i love it...and i'm sure you will too...if i'm not mistaken...i've made blueberry buckle out of this same recipe, and posted it here. as you will see, i keep adapting and improving this recipe. that's when a recipe rocks to me...when you can make it your own...so take this...and make it your own...and tell me about it.

the original recipe, new york crumb cake can be found here.

please enjoy it...and tell me if you love it!

peace...ki

bits of summer '09

before i began...i'd like to hug each and every one of you...like i do all my good friends when i greet them...like i do my family when i see them...and leave them. i still kiss my mom, grandma, and aunt goodbye...and hello...and i still hug my friends when i see them.

so i'm sending all of you hugs...beacause i care for you...and you all care for me. its amazing how these highways connect us with people we'd never encounter...and how close we can become. 

its been a while...so i have a bit to share with you...our summer...

i'm going to try (but probably not be too successful) to not get too wordy here...

summer seemed to have slowly crept than bumrushed us this year...it was an peculiar summer...seems as if it didn't want to comform to what i normally associate with summer...but it was a great one nonetheless...lots of inner change and growth...things evolved and happened to quickly...

i started bellydancing again

the lil lady lost two teeth

the lil guy took golf

the lil lady took piano

i took to painting again

the kids and i re-discovered "the price is right"

the kids moved up a step or two in reading...and are now reading step 2 books

my tomato crops didn't fair to well (i hear from martha this happened everywhere thanks to blight)

we got a new pet bird...a parakeet named charlie "birdman" parker

i designed new bags

i taught my first quilting class

and i have to repeat i perfected a 3-ingredient tomato/marinara sauce

i "found" and was "found" by good friends from the past on facebook

okay...i'm getting too wordy...here are some snapshots of my summer...

the kids:

putting

lessons from coach wheeler on how to "address the ball"

"yali" & "elephant in front of a painting

michael in front of a painting

playing on the swingset...

climbing...

climbing...

"wow...look how far i climbed"

charlie on my finger

charlie...

taking pictures of charlie...

food:

my favorite pizza: broccoli, pineapples, squash, chicken breast, mushrooms, a little soy cheese and homemade tomato sauce

everyone gets their own mini pizza...

...to top as they see fit...

"pizza roll" pizza toppings (broccoli, mushrooms, squash, chicken breast, fresh tomatoes, tomato sauce, soy cheese) rolled into a french bread loaf...

soooo...good!

vegan zucchini loaves...iced...ahh they freeze so well!

art:

untitled...mask, 1, mixed media on wood panel

untitled, mask, 2, mixed media on wood panel

untitled, girl with painted face, mixed media on wood panel

with only days left in summer...i'm looking forward to cool weather (just not too cold), working with fabric and fibers, cooking soups and baking bread, making hearty meals...making beautiful bags for the holidays...schooling the kids and watching them learn...developing more as an artist...

i can't wait to see what the new season holds for us!

thank you again for being such loving and caring friends! 

peace...ki

around the house this week....

we've been on "stay-cation" this past week or so...and so that means i've been a bit lazy...not really doing much...but then again...how can i when the a/c is out...and its about 100 degrees outside?

my garden is taking a beating...except for the tomatoes...which are taking off...along with the weeds!

a nice place for the kids...in the sun...amongst the grass and weeds...i'm knowing its a childhood right to be able to carelessly blow dandelion seeds...and wish for the future!

our harvest on the 4th of july...lots of ripe tomatoes (the cherry ones taste like candy), squash, a bell pepper, and a few carrots that were tangled up together.

this is the loads of squash i've been dealing with...this is one week's harvest. there is spaghetti squash, zucchini, round zucchini, golden zucchini, yellow squash, crook-neck squash...and some hybrid off to the corner of zucchini and spaghetti squash that i haven't figured out yet.

i've become inventive in how i use them...here are oatmeal squash raisin cake cookies...they were sweet enough that i skipped sandwiching them between a vegan cream cheese buttercream...maybe next time...

can you see the pride on my face? i love making a beautiful lattice pie...

i truly believe there is an art to making a beautiful crust!

and getting it to brown like this...without eggs or (cow's) milk....

this is the best apple pie...you'll ever taste...i promise!

a reflection in my studio...i saw it and immediately grabbed my camera....i love this!

i'm in love with summer...all its heat...all the time to play...and the endless blue skies above me. what's amazing is seeing the most puffy, whitest cumulus clouds floating off near the mountains when its hovering around 100 degrees...

i'm enjoying life, summer, the kids, e...painting and just being right in the middle of where i'm at:

physically, emotionally, artfully, and honestly....

may summer fuel you too!

peace...ki

p.s. our a/c is getting a much needed repair...as we speak! yes! relief!